Day 2 – Do You Know Who You Are?

When I looked at this question to start today’s writing I felt pretty good. I feel like at this point in my life I know myself pretty well. I’ve got some strengths and I’ve got my issues. I was fine with the first two questions – Who are you? What are your top three skills? But then I paused at the third question – What is your onlyness? I had never heard the term onlyness and I figure it is similar to unique.

Once I decided what I thought it meant I went into a little bit of an intellectual dialogue with myself. You see I have a big issue with the idea of me being a “unique” person. I am sure that some of that is that as a woman I have internalized some societal messages about not standing out. On the other hand I think the bigger challenge for me is that for most of my life I have stood out. I have been a Black person in predominantly white spaces and woman pastor in a predominantly male profession, a younger leaders around much older leaders. I have always stood out and not by my choice. I have yearned for a world where I walk into a room of pastors and am not the only youngish Black woman. I wish so many people could be in the places that I am in and I have spent much of my life trying to pry those spaces open.

And as the often only, the one who has access I have struggled with some guilt about my privilege. I love scuba diving, but some days I just feel sad that so few Black folks can engage. I am proud of speaking multiple languages, but sometimes am angry that other folks haven’t had the educational opportunity I’ve been afforded. Many people who know me would probably say I am probably the only singing, gardening, throw-down on the dance floor, scuba-diving, LGBT-affirming lady pastor that they know. All of these activities are outgrowths of my passion to explore the world, to be in deep community with people, to imagine a world that completely breaks the mold of what we think is possible.

I stand out in a crowd not only because I am a unique individual, but because I am part of a very small group of people who have had the privilege of exploring every passion that comes to them. A person who from the time that I was young everyone thought was going to “do big things.” Because of their confidence in me so many folks have opened doors for me that they didn’t for others.

I need to name this because to not do so would be to participate in a notion of exceptionalism that I reject. I hate the idea that some people are basically just born better than others. I not only reject that notion, I am dedicated to debunking it and to work for a world in which every human belongs to a community where people see how beautiful they are.

So I know that I have to tell my story in this book. It is the only thing I know well enough to claim to be an expert on. I  will share whatever insight I have come to, because when Spirit gives you something she always means for you to pass it on (cause if you can’t share you might need to sit on the time out step and think about your selfish behavior.)  At the same time I am hoping and praying that I can find a way to tell my story that is not a celebration of me, but rather a reminder of the divine spark that is in each of us. It is my prayer that at the end of reading the book everyone will ask – How can I see the divine spark in everyone around me? What if we extended the privilege that Rev. Mariama had to every being on this planet? What kind of path would we find if we all committed to shine our lights into the world together?

Book Writing – Day 1

I have decided to write a book and I am using a 30 day jump start process from Persuasion Publishers. Today I start with their Day 1 exercise which asks me to reflect -  

Why are you writing this book? What are your goals, or do you have a single goal? Why does getting your story and expertise out matter to you?

I guess the clearest reason is that I feel like this is what God is calling me to do. I have felt the urging for years but I have struggled to get started. I have a deep fear of not being able to get this done because of writing struggles I have had in the past and yet people close to me and folks I have just met keep urging me to write. So here I am trying to write this book, trying to embrace a discipline that has given me trouble for most of my life.

This blog is one I started in 2012 with the hopes of writing consistently. It is direct evidence of my fits and starts with writing. I have decided to continue with it rather than starting anew because I appreciate some of its content and I am choosing to be completely transparent about my struggle to be consistent about my writing.

If I am honest this book is probably as much about what I need to share with the world as it is about conquering my own demons related to writing. In this process I am committing to pushing through and hopefully past my block around writing. I really hope this will help me get past it, but maybe it will just teach me how to face a really hard thing and do it anyway. Maybe I will end up sitting for hours in struggle. I need to face the fear that I will never be an comfortable writer and still choose to write this book.

I am writing this book because the human race is at a decision point where we will evolve and transform or potentially see a mass die off as we push planetary conditions to the point where it will not sustain our species. The reality of this moment simultaneously breaks my heart and gives me the greatest sense of hope that I have had in my life. We will create unimaginable suffering or rise to this occasion in a beautiful mind blowing way. I imagine that God exists in this paradox between an unending love for humanity and the deep disappointment at how often we live so far below our purpose.

I am writing this book for everyone who feels deep pain about the state of our world and our future. I am writing for everyone who feels stuck and is looking for a path to action. I write for my ancestors who fought that I would have the ability to read and write. Ancestors who faced cataclysmic oppression and survived. I write for the young people that I love and who I see as our greatest hope for redemption. I write it for the members of my church who are loving and imagining our way to beloved community. I write for all the activists doing what they can to change the odds. I write for all the people who are too afraid to confront this because the current moment feels to hard to think about a worse future. I am writing for ever human that wants us to have a future.

Who knows if this book will ever get published or read by anyone other than the people who read it out of love for me. It may never live up to all my hopes and dreams – I release my attachment to what it will be and I commit to just taking a deep breath and continuing to nurture and give birth to this book.

How Would the Holy Family Fare With This Tax Bill?

This morning I heard on the news that the current tax bill in Congress was going to be a “great Christmas gift” to the American people. It made me wonder - What if Jesus decided to come back this Christmas. Would he agree with tax bill would it seem like a gift that honored his birthday?

We often forget that Mary and Joseph were traveling at the height of Mary’s pregnancy because of the census. The census was taken so that Caesar could properly collect taxes. One might say that they were on the road in the run up to an upcoming Roman tax bill.

As we hear about this tax I wonder if it will help working families like Mary and Joseph? Would they find themselves better off? If they did get more short-term income would they also be worried that they would saddle their children with future debt? What about the shepherds? Would they end up with money to buy a few more sheep?

From everything I am hearing in the analysis it seems clear that King Herod would be happy about the end of the Inheritance Tax, the Three Kings would get a break on their overseas investments and the Innkeeper would see his corporate tax rate go down from 35% to 21%. This bill seems to all hinge on the notion that these folks would take the money they receive and reinvest it. It assumes that if the innkeeper had extra income he would expand the inn, hire more folks and be able to offer an affordable room to the Holy Family.

In Luke 4 at the beginning of his public ministry Jesus enters the synagogue and quotes from the book of Isaiah saying,

““The Spirit of the Lord is on me,

   because he has anointed me

   to proclaim good news to the poor.

He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners

   and recovery of sight for the blind,

to set the oppressed free,

  to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”

This text framed the essence of Jesus reason for coming to Earth. I am not sure what Jesus would think about a trickle down economic strategy but I am clear how he would measure success. If this tax bill is going to be good news to the poor, if it will help former prisoners to re-integrate into society, if will offer health care and other services to those with disabilities and illnesses, if it will provide relief to those who are oppressed and on the margins…... If that is the kind of bill it is - well then it is a great Christmas. But if the bill puts the needs of Herod or the Innkeeper first, we should remember that neither of them welcomed the Christ child.

Many of our Congressions leaders are rushing to fit all of their votes in so they can get home to celebrate Christmas with their families. As they vote on this bill I hope they think of the Holy Family and be sure that their Christmas gift to the nation is one that the Christ child could celebrate.

Not Sure What America I Have Woken Up To.....

This last year has been really tough as I have faced the reality of how deeply our country is divided. Every election that I have participated in have been pretty evenly split and I told myself that our disagreements were mostly about policy. We disagreed on the morality of abortion or the efficacy of welfare. We disagreed about whether “criminals” could be reformed and about whether to approach the rest of the world from a position of strength or of openness. I knew we were divided, but I wanted to believe that the division was one that could be overcome through reasoned dialogue.

This is not to say that I was unaware of the continuing role of race and racism in America. I am a Black woman who watched white girls in my prep school use drugs I had never heard of and never face any jail time while Black youth in my neighborhood were locked up for smoking marijuana. I have witnessed how people look nerviously fearful or downright scornful when a woman in a hijab gets on the train. I have heard people, even in my community, speak against folks with accents or resent people who are speaking Spanish or Vietnamese. I just returned from Standing Rock to be in solidarity with Native Americans who are fighting for the rights they are already supposed to have.

I was not unaware of American racism, I was not unaware of our electoral division, but Donald Trump has shown me how deep the divide is. A year ago I would have said that speaking against a slain war hero was political suicide. I learned that if that person is Muslim – it is okay. I would have said that claiming you can force another country to pay for a policy that is against them is laughable. I learned that half of the country takes that seriously. I would have thought

I am a Black woman who wants to live in a country where Muslims are free to practice their religion, where men who grope women are shamed, where immigrants are respected, where our leaders speak the truth and take responsibility for their words, and where we can disagree with each other without suggesting that other person is stupid or deserves to be beat down. I think of each of these things are basic parts of what makes our country great and I don’t know what will happen to these basic American values as there is a movement to “make America great again.”

At a deeper level I wonder what this “Great America” will be like. Does it mean a return to the time when Black people “knew their place” under Jim Crow laws? Will we go back to a time when men were the “primary breadwinners” and women were mostly dependent on a spouse for economic support? In this “Great America” will gay, lesbian and transgender people live in fear for their lives or have to “suck it up” when people discriminate against them?

In this election I never really found my candidate. I never connected with Hilary because she represented an old way of doing things that I feel needs to change. After being cussed out by a Green Party volunteer I felt that they had no space for people like me.  I didn’t really consider the libertarian candidate because while I like some of their ideas, I couldn’t tell where he stood on a number of issues that are important to me. And then there was Donald Trump and his movement. I agreed that things needed to change, but all along it felt like the change they wanted was to go back to a time when I was a second-class citizen. How can I agree with change that doesn’t respect me or the people I love as human beings?

In the next few days and months we are going to really understand what this “Make America Great Again” movement is really about. The truth is that I have a deep concern that borders on fear. I believe deeply in God and will continue to pray for healing in the aftermath of this contentious election, but it is hard for me to understand what the future holds. So my question to the “Make America Great Again” movement – Do you plans align with your Trump supporters like David Duke? Do you see me as part of your country or do you think you would be better off without me? Until I know the answer to this basic question I am not sure what country I have woken up to this morning. In the coming days I will cautiously watch everything you say to understand if my life matters to your movement.

Story of South African firefighters brings me joy, then sorrow-filled anger, and finally - resolve

For the past two days I have been cleaning my email and came across this inspiring video from a fellow climate change advocate. It depicted a group of 300 South African fire fighters landing in Edmonton, Canada ready to help put out the wildfires that were raging in the Canadian forest this past May. Take a moment to watch the video and you might feel the same sense of deep joy and inspiration about the power of the human spirit.

We know that forest fires are going to become even more common in our world as drought combined with bad development decisions create the perfect conditions for massive fires. We have watched fires rip through California this summer and the Edmonton fires that these fire fighters came to address were so serious that they required support from around the world.

As a person of African descent there was something particularly powerful about seeing so many Black firefighters. In Boston our fire department has had a history of being on the wrong side of race relations and they continue to have significant diversity challenges.

The sound of bag pipes played by firefighters has come to be a sacred moment for me. I have fond memories of sitting on the front porch with my firefighter neighbor listening to him play Amazing Grace. Something about the connection between sacred music and those who face the death of fire is powerful. So seeing these firefighters sing and dance with joy as they prepare to face dangerous flames really humbled me.

I thought about this being the response I want to see us bring to the climate crisis. We will have to face fires, hurricanes, droughts, and floods with spiritual resolve to cultivate gratitude in the face of destruction. We will need this spirit to not only reside in the four walls of our religious buildings but to be embodied by firefighters, health care workers, police makers and police officers. When I watched this video I saw people who embodied the spirit that pushes back against death and destruction.

This moment was so powerful that I decided to take a break from my other writing to write this blog.

And then in the background another YouTube video began to play. It chronicled the deeper story behind this video. It showed how international issue of economic justice remain powerful forces to destroy the best of what we can be. This video chronicled the ways that the Alberta government welcomed the South African firefighters at such low salaries that they were being paid less per day than other firefighters were making in an hour. The Alberta government had turned down offers from other developed countries which would have required standard firefighter wages, to pay these South African fire fighters cheaper wages.

What became clear to me is that the powerful society I dream of cannot co-exist with the corrupt system that we have right now. We cannot have a system that devalues peoples lives to protect profits and think that we are going to save the human race from impending disaster.  If we are going to build the strong and interdependent society that will allow us to break our addiction to fossil fuels, reverse trends of gross economic inequity and avert the current and coming disasters of the climate crisis - we have to move ourselves in a different direction. We have to start by rejecting any systems that try to bargain with the value of human life and human dignity.

This is not just an indictment of the Alberta government or politicians in general or even economic bigwigs who defend low wages, this is also a critique of liberals and others who say they care about low income people. I am a climate activist so my critism begins there. Folks who make their living on fossil fuels are going to continue to block climate work until the climate movement demonstrates a serious commitment to their lives and finding a future for them.

There a brothers and sisters of every race sitting at home when they would much rather the be working at the factory that abandoned their town. There are formerly incarcerated folks who got into trouble often because they also couldn't find work. There are folks fighting cancer because they got an extra dose of environmental pollution and don't have adequate health care to get the treatment they need. There are residents of Kiribati who are watching their island be eroded by sea level rise while the world argues about whose responsibility it is to resettle climate refugees. There are South Africans who fought to tranform their society and are not struggling to survive in the wake of ongoing poverty and lack of resource redistribution. I want to be standing arm and arm with these folks signing and dancing and preparing to take on the task of pushing back a deadly crisis. I want to be in solidarity with them and I want to make sure that we we get in the trenches I have not cooperated with a system that pays $50/ day while I make up to $200 for the same work. If we are going to face the crisis before us we need spirit, we need unity and we need just equitable resource distribution for all of us who are willing to fight the fire.

Why I Was Willing to Be Arrested on My Birthday

It is 3am and in a few hours I will be arraigned in West Roxbury Court. I am one of 24 people who was arrested yesterday for standing in the way of the construction of the West Roxbury Lateral Pipeline. After years of fighting to keep my young people out of prison, I feel the need to explain why I made a decision to break the law yesterday. There are three key reason that I must explain.

1. I believe that the actions of Spectra energy and the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission are a violation of democratic law.
Around the country Spectra is installing new high pressure methane gas lines. They claim that we need them for our energy supply. The Federal Energy Regulation Commission (FERC) is supposed to oversee Spectra, but this agency is funded by the fossil fuel industry and its commission is full of former energy company executives. FERC allowed this project to go through and granted eminent domain to Spectra without dialogue get with the City of Boston. The City is currently working to stop this project in court and to make Spectra submit to the city's permitting process. I fundamentally believe it is wrong for the federal government to allow a project like this to go forward without listening to the needs of the people who are directly affected. If you want to understand more about what FERC is doing, I highly recommend this video. It is about the work Spectra did in New York. (http://www.indiewire.com/2016/03/watch-josh-fox-gets-arrested-in-exclusive-new-short-from-the-anti-fracking-documentarian-crusader-42873/)

2. I feel called to be a bridge builder that helps unite the climate movement into a larger social justice movement. 
To stop the worst outcomes of climate change will require a massive global shift in the way we live. Those who will be most directly affected by climate change, already face the injustices of poverty, racism that lead to disparities in health, educational access, food supplies and every basic human need. Those who will suffer the most hated to be at the center of decision making about the road forward. The climate movement is mostly white and mostly middle to upper class and rarely led by those who will suffer the most. This must change not only because it is morally wrong, but because there is no way this movement can work if it does not embrace and support the masses of everyday people who are disconnected from this work. Having been an activist on so many other issues of racial and economic justice, I hope I can play a unique role as a Black woman of faith to help the climate movement to connect with other movements to unite for change on a much more global scale.

3. I hope that my demonstration of commitment will cause the people who know me and love me to also take action.
I have been deeply convicted about the dangers of climate change since 2005 when I watched people suffer and die in the face of Hurricane Katrina. In the last two years my commitment has deepened and if you know me then you have heard me talk about climate change. It is always on my mind. When I walk through my neighborhood I worry about how the elderly will survive in a storm. Yesterday I watched the sunset at Carson Beach with my family and I considered how sad it will be when sea level rise eliminated the Boston shoreline. I look out on Thompson Island and recognize that future school children will not be able to go do the ropes course because it will be under water. We need a mass movement right now to avoid the worst climate impacts and most of the people in my life are struggling to even recycle. I am hoping that putting my own body on the line will help them to wake up and to join this struggle. I don't have enough capacity to do this on my own. I feel like I am pushing a rock up a hill and I need my people's to help me. I am hoping their love for me will make them pay attention. A little more.

It is 9am and I have to walk into the courthouse, but I hope this will awaken awareness in all the people who are wondering why the heck I got arrested on my birthday.

NOTE - A few weeks after our arrest, my friend Karenna, who also got arrested, published this great peice which summarizes the reason for our opposition of the West Roxbury Lateral Pipeline. Please take a moment to read it - Why I was arrested in West Roxbury

A Birthday Reflection on Life and Death

Today is my birthday. On this day I celebrate the amazing gift of life. I celebrate my parents, my sister, my husband, my extended family, my community and my God. On this day I am thankful for my life and the amazing support network that allows me to live with deep purpose and conviction.

On this day I also mourn. I mourn the death of Kareem Burey who was killed on this day in 2005. When I met Kareem I instantly felt the warmth, charisma and passion that he had. His life was taken before he was able to demonstrate the fullness of what God placed within him. Today I remember Kareem and I remain committed to supporting the young people that God has placed in my life. I pray that neither racism nor sexism nor homophobia nor trauma nor depression nor insecurity nor any of the ills that snuff out the lives of young people, will take the lives of any more young people.

My birthday comes just as young people are getting out of school and the summer is heating up. I have often dreaded the youth violence that often comes with the summer months. For the past two years the end of June has also come with a mass shooting, last year in Charleston, this year in Orlando. The warming season that should be about trips to the beach, cookouts and family reunions has become increasingly associated with death.

Around the globe, particularly in the warmest parts of the world, the onset of summer is also associated with death from heat waves. In Syria the summer heat meant a lack of rain and the death of crops. Hungry people fled to the cities increasingly destabilizing an already weak economy and increasing the conflict between resistance groups and the government. Syrians became the world's most visible climate refugees.

In Pakistan the heat wave from last summer was so bad that it killed more than 1,300 people. The young, the elderly, the sick and the poor were most vulnerable and many perished. This year one cemetary started digging mass graves in advance of heat waves. This is the reality of summer as climate change becomes more common in our world.

On the day when I celebrate the gift of my life, my only desire is for a world that honors and protects all life. I want for us to care about the lives of little Black girls in Roxbury whose asthma keeps them from trying out for sports teams and men who are languishing in the prisons because a lack of opportunity led to a life of addiction. I want to live in a world where the indigenous people of the Amazon are allowed to protect the land of their ancestors and where children in India are not forced to beg on the street because of economic inequality. I want to live in a world where Congolese bonobos are no longer endangered and where the water in Flint Michigan is not a source of danger.

I am the hope and the dream of people who were stolen from their land and not even considered human. Their prayers and their sacrifices made my life possible and I must do the same from the next generation. For years I worked on issues of youth development, education and criminal justice. Now folks see me active on climate change and it seems like I have changed my focus. I actually see my work now as deeply connected to what I was doing before. Right now I am trying to save the lives of future generations of poor people, people of color, indigenous communities. I am also trying to do that in a way that transitions us to an economy that is not about sucking up all the resources for the benefit of a small group of people.

As the temperature continues to rise I am also committing to turn up the heat on my organizing. I refuse to believe that we cannot turn this situation around and I am willing to marshall all of my resources of human development, creativity, strategic thinking, and spiritual discipline to work for a transition away from the broken economic, political and social system that we have to one that values the life of all of God's creation and that sets us on a path to honor the lives of every human being. This blog will be a place where I share my journey and challenge you to join me in this quest to save our species.

On this my birthday I ask you to consider taking 3 actions -

1. Subscribe to my blog so that you can follow my journey and find more ways to get involved. On the right side of the blog screen there is a space to "Follow By Email."

2. Watch the movie - How to Let Go of the World and Love All the Things Climate Can't Change. If you have access to HBO you can get it On Demand or with HBO Go. If you don't have HBO stay tuned because I will be organizing a screening. For those of you who feel you need to know more about climate change it will give you a crash course. For those of you who work on climate change it will give you hope for the future.

3. Learn more about a dangerous methane (natural gas) pipeline that is being built in the Boston neighborhood of West Roxbury and which is 2 miles from my church. It puts my church and many of our members in danger and I want to sound the alarm about this. You will definitely hear more from me about this, because it is one of the ways that I will be stepping up to fight climate change. To learn more visit Resist the Pipeline.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. It is one of the best birthday gifts you could have given me!